TGIF

Yesterday was rough! Maysie was fussy the majority of the day, and I was feeling very isolated. Not so much from everyone, but from Maysie's dad- the one person I want to be closer to. It's hard maintaining a relationship with him because he seems so aloof about seeing his daughter. He'll talk a big game at times, but his actions hardly ever follow his words. I wish I didn't allow him to get to me so easily- he drives the knife deep, but I keep giving it to him, then I stand there with my arms open saying "let me have it".
Foolish. I'm tired of crying about it....

Maysie is having sleep issues that I don't know how to deal with. She had created a good schedule of going to bed at 8, then waking two times during the night around 12:30 and 4:30. Now she won't go to bed in her crib until after 9- though she will sleep in my arms, as soon as I put her down she's wide awake and fussing. I tried putting her down without being swaddled last night since she always struggled to get out of the wrap and sometimes even cries when I put her in it. She woke up within 5 minutes both times I tried. The last time I swaddled her; she finally went to bed- maybe out of comfort from being wrapped, or maybe out of exhaustion from the late hour and fussiness all evening. There were a few times last night when I felt I couldn't handle it any more- I was going to come unglued...but what other options do I have? I don't have a co-parent to hand her over to when I need a time out. The good part of this new sleep pattern is she only wakes once at 3am.....

Being a single parent is hard!

She did lift her chest off the floor during tummy time yesterday! I was very excited and proud! She's not suppoed to do that until around 3 months. Maysie will be 2 months in the 16th. She's advanced!

I really want some cake and/ or pizza. I wish I wasn't hungry all the time! Maybe I should stop watching the Food Network....