Sunday, January 31, 2010

Maysie pics: My baby in the snow!

We went out and played in the snow at my parent's house today. She loved the sledding, and eating Grandma's homemade snow ice cream.
Isn't it funny how we pass on so much of our personalities to our children? For example: I am a creature of habit. I always have been to a degree, but even more so now in my adult years. Raising an infant ala solo to 15 months also contributed to my tendancies to tight schedules and life-patterns. I'm trying to ease up a bit in that corner of my psyche (see previous post), but some habits will continue....
Maysie has lived her little life thus far watching me and living these habits and schedules with me. She, too, has picked up on what should go where and when, etc. Last night, as we were preparing to sit down to dinner at my mom and dad's house, Dad sat by Maysie (the spot usually reserved for me) just to visit while I made my plate. Maysie's near immediate response to Poppy's presence: "No, Poppy! That's Mommy's chair!" Ha! Maybe this means she'll come to appreciate and immulate my everything-in-its-own-logical-place oraganizational metality....

Friday, January 29, 2010

Snowed in....again

Three weeks into the new quarter at school, and we are dipping back into our summer with more snow days. Hmmph.... Well, perhaps I can catch up a bit on this ol' blog.

I've been making slow but sure progress with myself so far this year. I made a mental resolution list (which I had intended to post, but down-time usually turns to falling asleep on the couch come 9pm). So, I'll take it one resolution at a time, and fill in the details for each one.
1. Get in shape (welcome back, resolution #1...haven't seen you since early '09)
I've been going to the gym twice a week for cardio classes. I want to add another night of work-out time to my regime, but I don't want to be away from Maysie. I'm going to invest in a DVD and see how that goes. Maybe I can shoo my husband away for 30 minutes so I can get my sweat on. I really don't like to be watched while I work out, especially when doing aerobics and the watcher is not doing aerobics. I feel like I'm being scrutinized. I joined a "Biggest Loser" competition with other staff in my building. We each put in $10; the biggest percentage loser in 8 weeks gets the pot. I do not expect to win. Even if I reach my goal lossage, it will only be .07%. I only joined to help motivate me extrinsically; and it's fun to celebrate each other's successes. I've been trying to feed my family heathier, too. More fresh vegetables and such... but oh, do I love pasta. Tortellini may be the "death" of my waistline one day.
2. Be a better wife
This is the tough one. While I don't think that I'm a bad wife, I know I have room to improve. I'm trying harder to be patient and compromising with my husband (who has told me that I don't compromise), and I'm trying to communicate more openly and encourage him to do the same. In so many ways, we don't see eye to eye. And I'm beginning to notice that the more I learn about him on a deeper level, the more different I realize we are. But, we both love Maysie like crazy, and that's what matters most to me.
3. Bend a little
This one is somewhat derivative of resolution #2. I'm trying to let myself be okay with a divergance from the normal everyday routine with Maysie. So far, she's had dinner closer to 6 than 5:30 many nights, and lightening has not struck me yet. She has also gotten to bed at 8 rather than 7:30 several nights, and she still functions just fine at school. I'm also trying to be open to activities that previously I would not have even considered, like travel. A close family friend of my husband has invited us to his home in CA this April to celebrate his granddaughter's 3rd birthday. At first, I told Chadi, "You can go with out us. It would be too hard with Maysie's daily routine." But he encouraged me to think about it. We'd be staying with a family with 2 young grandchildren, so their house is equiped for toddlers, as well as their cars. The activities we would partake in would already be inconsideration of the 1 and 3 year old living there, so adding a 2 year old to the mix isn't a huge imposition as I imagined it would be. I told Chadi to accept the invitation. There's no going back now; I'm actually getting a bit excited!

I've kept my list at 3 resolutions for now. Maybe I'll add a few here and there as I find need to, but small is more obtainable. Wish me luck!

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Breaking Cabin Fever

Because of the snow, ice, and school closing this past week, I have developed a case of severe cabin fever(due to sketchy road conditions, freezing temperatures, and lack of funding to really do anything). Last night, a dear friend rescued Maysie and me from our homebound status. We took a trip to Barnes & Noble for coffee and a change of scenery. I told Maysie we were going to the book store; her reply, "I play with choo choo train." She remembered the track set up in the children's area from the last time we visited a month or so ago. Not even 2 yet- she's brilliant, folks! Today, we ventured out yet again after nap. Daddy worked the mid-shift today, so it was just us girls. I drove by the book store, and Maysie pointed toward it and said, "I go that way;I play with choo choo train." (I'm not making this up- she's very articulate for her age.) Seriouly, how could I say no? Besides, I can (always) enjoy another mocha. (Two days in a row? Such luxury!) The trains were quite the popular hang out for preschoolers this afternoon. I could tell that Maysie might just be getting tired of the All-Momma-All-the-Time show at home when she eagerly and voluntarily showed her train to a strange man who was there with his child. She's not a shy girl, but it usually takes her some time and coaxing to warm up to a new face, but she might just have gone home with them if offered. Perhaps drop-off at her "school" Monday won't be so bad after all.

On a different note, I made an inch of progress with Project Reinvention today. I went to the gym this morning for their dance aerobics class. I really enjoyed it. I also checked out the child care area while I was there. I do believe Maysie will have fun there; maybe enough to not notice that Momma has run off to shake her hiney in Zumba. I've also been considering auditioning for the summer musical at my local theater in June. They're (funny, I used to say "we're" when referring to that same theatre) doing South Pacfic. At first, the show did not appeal to me, but I checked out a synopsis online, and it looks interesting afterall. I mentioed it to my friend last night, and she was very encouraging. (Don't ya'just love friends?) Since it's during the summer, I would have all day with Maysie (at least 3 week days anyway because I usually work in the summer); really, I would only be missing out on an hour of Maysie time and only 4 nights a week. That time, though, is when she has bath, story, and goes to bed- so it's quality time. It is only temperary, however. The biggest obstacle (besides the guilt I'd be struggling with for selfishly doing something only for me)is that my husband plans to visit his family in Egypt for the entire month of June, which is when rehearsals start. I would need to arrange for someone to bathe and put Mays to bed and stay at the house until I get home. My coffee friend expressed interest in helping if she is available, but I couldn't expect her to give up her Monday-Thursday evenings for the entire summer. Hmmmm..... I need to think about this one before I get my mind too set on the idea of auditioning. I really do miss the stage....

Next, now that I'm getting back into this blogging business, I need to revamp my page, but I really don't know how. I like having a picture, but it's too big! It askews the rest of my stuff. I also want to add links to other blogs that I look at, but, again, I don't know how.... My lack of techno-savvy really makes me feel old...

Finally- My husband likes to tease me about how many people in this town I know. I always see familiar faces when we're out and about. Today I saw 1 former student at B&N, and 1 current student (who looked surprised to find that I, too, go to Walmart), 5 former students, and 2 old friends at the store. So far it's a record!

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

2010- the Year of Reinvention...

So one year and some months later, I resurface in this blogging world. Who knows if I'll be able to update regularly. I can think of so many other activities to do with my (little) free time: grading paper, cleaning, resting, updating scrapbooks, reading....yet, the beacon of technology is somehow more enticing. My cousin is able to keep her blog up and running with a teeny and adorable baby girl along with a full time job, so surely I can too. In addition, I've remarried, so I have an extra set of willing hands to share parenting duties (though, I've learned that momma is ALWAYS on duty).
So now the question is, what do I write about? No more do I wish to use a blog as a sounding board for my issues, nor do I have as many- thank God! I wrapped up 2007 (The Year of Breaking Down) along with a sprinkle of the drama from 2008 (The Year of New Beginnings) and threw it out the window. I've made peace with those years.... Last year I named "The Year of Letting Go" because it became necessary for me to hand over the reins that I clutched so tightly, in all parts of my life, to others. I had an intern for the first part of the school year, I also co-teach with another teacher in the afternoons, which means that I had to let go of my classes and my "new and excting lesson ideas for next year". I love the act of teaching- maybe because it is an act, and I'm an actor at heart; but with a co-teacher, I must share that job, including the fun, the delivery, and (Wooohaa!) the grading with another. Not that I'm stingy; I like sharing, but I get a specific idea of how I feel a task (lesson) should be carried out in order for maximum efficiency. It's been hard to watch someone else do it differently than I would. ......but I'm learning, and we are beginning to find a balance.
On top of all that, a new addition to our household posed a new challenge. I remarried in May. In October, he was finally home for good. Since Maysie's birth, I have had a fairly tight routine that ensures everything gets done around the house and done well. It's been difficult allowing someone with no real experience with parenting or running a household to interrupt..... I mean share my routine. But with that I am also learning and enjoying the relief of some around the house jobs.
2010 will be "The Year of Reinvention". I intend to rediscover a self lost in the sadness and drama and stiff house hold regimen. I want to go back to the gym, when I can. I want to paint more, cook more (which I've really enjoyed starting again), spend time with friends, maybe audition again- though I can't see that happening very soon. I hoping that by trying again all the things I love, I can find me, but a new me. Me, changed for the better, stronger, more understanding and patient. We shall see.......